it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
