he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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