just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
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I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
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Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
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