We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
