Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
