Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
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