Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
