I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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