can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Pants 0. Shit 1.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Randomize