Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
