what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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