I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
