we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
