I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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