It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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