If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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