And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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