when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize