I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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