Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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