i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Randomize
