apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
