Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
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