I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
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