what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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