Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
