Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
