didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
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