how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
