you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize