Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
did i just pee glitter
Randomize
