you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Randomize
