You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
The air taste purple.
Randomize
