is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Randomize
