Who did Billy Mays play for?
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
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