Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
