Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
