So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome