Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
