Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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