yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
