Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
