look no pants
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
it's like heaven, but drunker
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
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