No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
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