i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
