Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
