Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
