jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Randomize
