i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
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