i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
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